I do not like to keep most things to myself
I like to shoot confetti cannons of joy on everyone I know, when I have good news, unfortunately whether it be good timing or not. I will also call you and play the smallest violin in the world to discuss all of my woes. I will text you at inappropriate times with inappropriate descriptions of my mental state and the intense emotions I feel for those who have wronged me.
“Hello, my turtle, our pet of 8 years, is currently decomposing in the backyard.
I turned his tank into a terrarium filled with succulents and then emptied it because everyone thought it was his burial place.
Now, 10 cent gold fish inhabit Reef’s former glass prison.
Oh yeah, I lost my job and gained 102 pounds.
Did I tell you my kids were frick’n geniuses? K, TTYL8R -Love you, Bye!”
And now this: a terrarium in a light bulb. Because light bulbs are not just for crack anymore. http://thehipsterho.me/2010/01/how-to-make-a-tiny-terrarium-in-a-light-bulb/
So many pets are never lucky enough to have three kids arounds. He had it good. He was loved.
xoxoxoxox
Spouse reads blog and says “you crazy”. He’s the one that likes crazy bitches.